The Whyfe’s Thursday’s Therapy Thoughts: YOUR Grace is SUFFICIENT!





Disclaimer: Before Bible thumpers get their Sunday’s best in a bunch…I am by no means rephrasing scripture to meet my needs at my knees…The title is a simple play on familiar words folks…Pipe down…pipe down. I love GOD, that’s not a secret; this space is safe for all though, no matter how they present or who they honor in prayer.

I’m trying something new here folks so bear with me…LOL. As some of you know…I’m a therapist…the real kind. Not the homegirl with the good advice, or the aspiring sage life coach with the dope IG quotes…I’ma real life licensed clinician…I have the school loans to prove it.

This post is random and unplanned – they all are – Buuuut i’m thinking maybe I’d like move toward being a little more intentional;at least on Thursdays. It just so happens that outside of my regular evening sessions, I find myself in “unofficial” sessions at my day-time job in education; and oddly enough, often on Thursdays. Soooo…I figured, why not share these insights with the world, since I’m giving them away for free at work anyway.

Anywho, back to the topic at hand..YOUR grace is sufficient.

There’s never been a shortage of frustration, irritation, unhappiness, anger, sadness, grief, and all the other sucky emotions we encounter; but there seems to be an influx of late. It almost feels like it’s palpable in the air, visible almost, in big, dark, BOLD grey lettering…just lingering. It’s on the radio, it’s on TV, it’s in the movies, on social media, in the news media, wherever you go…it’s just THERE. Being shouted, written, sang, tik tok’d, IG’d, Facebooked…everybody’s, every feeling, is everywhere! All in all, people being more expressive is a good thing from a therapist point of view; but too much of anything is…well..too much.

People are seeking therapy at an all time high, cathartic posts are the new wave, & self-care is the new “buzz-word”. I haven’t quite figured out if it’s doing a great good or breeding some small harm; what I do know is, there’s definitely been a shift.

What I also know is, there’s an absence of “grace”. Not pray over your food “grace”, not be quiet, dainty, and demure “grace”, but allowance and acceptance of what “is“, GRACE.

There seems to be a push to forgive & forge forward, address it & seek apologies, call it out & cut it down. ACCOUNTABILITY AT ANY COST. What’s not being recognized though is, sometimes it’s ok to acknowledge what “is” before you can entertain what will be, should be, or could be.

My suggestion…

Before you make your declarations, demands, and decisions known and heard; sit with it for a bit. Sit with what “is” without announcing it to the world. Sit with what “is” without expecting immediate action from yourself. Sit with what “is” without expecting immediate action from someone else. Sit with what “is” and give yourself some time to identify what that truth means for you, what changes it will require from you, what the feelings mean to you, & where this info leads you to.

And then…

Offer yourself some GRACE. Grace in the form of forgiveness, patience, & kindness to navigate this space, YOUR space, without expectations. Offer yourself some GRACE by granting yourself permission to not beat yourself up if you don’t have a clear direction for yourself. Offer yourself some GRACE by granting yourself permission to not have a declaration for the world. Offer yourself some GRACE by granting yourself permission to not have a decision overall. Offer yourself some GRACE if you’re not ready to forgive what was done and/or said to you, just for the sake of being able to say you have the ever elusive,closure or ability to move forward.

Be comfortable enough to tell whomever, whenever, that you aren’t ready to forgive them, talk to them, see them; and for right now your GRACE will have to be sufficient in the absence of your “forgiveness”. Your GRACE is enough when it’s all you can muster. Your GRACE is enough when anything else is too much. Your GRACE, however if comes to you dressed, IS SUFFICIENT!

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